How Does God Speak?

Jeanine is a friend of this blog and she recently sent me a great idea from another blog that does a "Friday Five" list.

I've been going through the wringer on a personal level over the past few weeks and so the list that was posted really seemed apropos.

Sometimes we know God is out there, but we just can't feel His touch. So I want to take a moment to focus on and remember the ways in which God has spoken and does speak to me.

How has God revealed Himself to you in...

A Book:
Obviously, He has revealed Himself through the Bible. This is probably one of the most powerful ways God speaks to me, because I love to read.

But I remember a few years ago, before I came out to myself, I was driving through town and saw a huge sign: BOOK CLOSEOUT

I swerved across traffic, veering into the parking lot and came to a stop with squealing tires. I browsed the entire sale walking around the table marked "Christian" at the end of my shopping. I walked around it twice to make sure I didn't miss anything and that's when it happened.

I saw a bright green book. It seemed to jump off the shelf at me as its title caught my attention. Uncommon Calling. It was the story of a gay Christian fighting for ordination in the 1980's in a mainline denomination.

I was terrified to buy that book, because it was labeled "gay," and I hadn't even labeled myself that yet. But I knew that I needed to read that book. I took it home and devoured it. That was one step on this fantastic journey toward authenticity and communion where God used a book to speak to me very clearly.

A Film:
There are many over the years, but the one that profoundly touches me every time is The Passion of the Christ.

When I first went to see it, I had no preconceptions. I simply prayed, "Lord, speak to me."

It was graphic and overwhelming as anyone who's seen it can tell you. At one point, I fought to keep my eyes on the screen. Tears were pouring over my cheeks and I wanted to look away. But I couldn't.

In that moment during the scene where Jesus is being whipped, there is a flashback shot to the last supper. Jesus is holding the bread and breaks it "this is my body which was broken for you."

I wept. My salvation was real again. I've not been the same since.

A Song:
I am a musician, so these examples are also plentiful. One of my favorites within the last year is sung by India Arie called There's Hope.

"It's about the size of the faith in your heart."

A Person: (not going to post a pic for this one...as it's an anonymous blog!)
God has used so many people in my life to speak His grace and love to me. The one that jumps out is the first person I ever came out to. She is a dear friend who'd been a minister of a United Church of Christ congregation. We met however through a mutual employer.

When I came out to myself, she was the first one I told. I remember it so vividly. We were sitting at lunch. We caught up on all the things going on in our lives. And I just decided to tell her.

My head was full of internalized homophobia still. I was fearful of what people would say and think. I thought everyone looked on the gay community and being gay like I did according to how I'd been taught.

When I finally said those words, she looked me straight in the eyes, reached across the table and put her hand on mine and said, "that's so wonderful".

For another hour or two we sat there and God ministered healing and peace to my heart through her words. I left there a changed man.

I have been able to take the advice she gave me on that Sunday afternoon long ago and use it to minister to others who are in the same boat as I am. And in a sense, that's the reason for this whole blog...to minister.

Nature:
I love the ocean and the beach. This is the place in nature where I feel most connected to God.

I remember a few years ago, I was in the Caribbean on a small island. I had traveled there alone. I had no phone, no TV, and no internet. There were a few shops on the island, but no stores or shopping malls. I knew no one, and I was there for four days.

One of the evenings, I traveled to a secluded beach and decided to watch the sun setting. I drove down to the water and climbed up on a large boulder. I watched the tide come in from my perch about 10 feet off the water. As it rolled in, I noticed small snails that would wash up and cling to the rock face.

As I watched the sun dipping toward the water on the horizon, I realized that just as I was watching the snails on the rock, God was watching me.