Tuesday, July 22, 2008

The Love of God

I have accidentally fallen in love with Jesus Christ. Yet, the more I know about him, the less I feel like a "Christian".

This quote from Otrolado's latest post struck a chord with me. So succinct, yet so telling. When I look into Christ's face, I see in His eyes my own hipocracies and short-comings. Yet I do not see judgement or condemnation. Instead I find love. What amazing grace this is!

And it is in that love that I am healed and restored. And it is that love that I extend then to other people. And I am reminded that "nothing...shall separate us from the love of God."

Friday, July 18, 2008

The "Right One"

(I apologize in advance for the philosophical tone of this post...unless you enjoy philosophy. Then I hope you enjoy.)

How do you know if someone’s the “right one”?

Is it all luck? Is it some cosmic mix of luck, intervention by Providence and hard work? Or do you just “make it work” in whatever situation or relationship you find yourself?

Maybe we’re asking the wrong questions. Maybe we shouldn’t be asking these questions at all. Maybe we should be active in living the answers. Maybe.

I struggle to free myself from the tendency to jump into the “what ifs” and questions that lead to uncertainty and greater questioning.

The questions that we ask so often arise from our mind’s need to control our situations and circumstances. But control is something we feel, not something that is real. In reality, we have no control, but we do not want to admit this fact.

Instead, we create questions and formulas and protocols for finding the “right one.” The “right one” just is. In fact, all of life just is. There is no magic formula. There is no luck. There is. That’s all.

All that remains is acceptance.

Saturday, July 05, 2008

Expectations, Assumptions and Communication

We are all so different. I know this is stating the obvious, but I was struck again last night with how distinctly different we all are as human beings. We think differently, process differently and communicate differently.

And the weird part is that I can't imagine being any different than I am. So it's hard to understand where another person is really coming from.

To throw more difficulty into the process, our minds create expectations and then assumptions based on our experiences. These often become roadblocks that blind us from objectivity.

So how can I break the power of my own assumptions and expectations? Well, I suppose the main way would be not to create them in the first place. That is an ongoing reconditioning, though. First, I have to be aware of when I have made the assumptions or expectations.

Awareness, for me, starts with listening. Awareness comes from truly hearing what is being said...in all forms of communication. But listening is not enough. I have to combine listening with a willingness to lay down my defenses and barriers. And that's the hardest part--to listen without formulating a counter or opposing point of view.

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Here We Go Again...

What a difference a week makes! I just re-read the previous post entitled What is Love?

With that post, I feel like I may have jumped into the deep end of the pool. It's almost humorous. It is as if God is saying, "That's all great philosophy...but now let's see how you put it into practice!"

You see, I've been on a dating haitus. I decided I'm not going to get involved with anyone. I'm going to focus my energy on Christ and my relationship with Him. I also decided to focus my energy on really determining what it is that I want in my life as far as a partner is concerned.

Now for the context.

Last monday, a member of a forum I frequent contacted me. The other member lives in my city and we happened to be in the same part of town...actually about two blocks away, so I walked down the street and we met each other in person.

I wasn't thinking a thing. (Remember, dating was not in my "plan"?) So we chatted. We both grew up in the same denomination and so we shared our stories. And when the invitation to meet again later for dinner came, I went along without much of a thought. (I know...I'm a bit naive!)

Well...long story short, we've really kicked it off and have spent some time together over the last week. So what's wrong? Nothing...yet. I'm a bit cynical. I'm waiting for the shoe to drop.

The question that I'm faced with now is "what do we do now?" As I stated before, this was not part of my plan. I realize that the more I try not to fall, the harder I do. What's up with that?

So, what do I do now? I guess I go forward one moment at a time and take the time necessary to really get to know this person who seems to be so "perfect" now.

But there's part of me that seizes up and thinks, here we go again.