I know in my own life, what I have experienced as love in a myriad of relationships has been almost universally mis-identified and misunderstood.
In the section on Love in his book The Road Less Traveled, M. Scott Peck defines love as "the will to extend one's self for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth."
Later he contends that "true love is not a feeling by which we are overwhelmed."
(Love) is a committed, thoughtful decision.
He continues: "The common tendency to confuse love with the feeling of love allows people all manner of self-deception."
This truth hit me like a sledge hammer. Nearly all the drama in my relationships has been caused by my confusion of "the feeling of love" with love itself. I still am not sure of all the implications of this new understanding, but I am spending some time really thinking about this.
All kinds of questions pop up about the importance of "chemistry" and the "feelings" and "emotions" that make up our modern concept of love. I am growing as I develop my own understanding of love and from that understanding, choose what experience I want for my life.
What is love? Perhaps the poet says it best. Love is a many-splendored thing.
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